Managing Difficult Emotions

Our camp counselors will be trained using the following behavioral model. Please help us reinforce these behaviors by practicing these at home with your camper. This behavior model was created by our Mental Health Manager within the Department of Wellness.

 

Remember this is a time for modeling calm behavior under stress. This is a teaching moment, not a time to blame or lecture. Regulate yourself first if needed. Try to maintain a neutral face, open posture and calming tone of voice.

 

1. Verbally identify the behavior.
   1. “You are yelling at me.”
2. Verbally identify the emotion.
   1. “Are you feeling angry?”
3. Verbally identify the potential trigger.
   1. “Why are you feeling angry?”
4. Verbally empathize with the feeling.
   1. “That is really hard. I can see why you are upset, do you want to talk about it?” (This is a good time to just sit quietly with the person or offer a touch point the camper is comfortable with (high five, fist bump, hand on shoulder, hug, etc.) as they a start to regulate by being heard and understood. Once the person is more regulated, move on to step 5.)
5. State the boundary for acceptable behavior. 
   1. “Its okay to be angry. But, it isn’t okay to yell at me. “
6. Provide a healthier alternative to communicate the feeling and/or regulate the emotion.
   1. “You can try telling me you are angry, writing me a letter, or ask to have some space until you feel more okay and ready to talk.